


Happy Birthday, I Made You a Mess

by Sportscandycollective



Category: LazyTown
Genre: Baking, EVERYTHING GOES WRONG, Fluff, Fluffy Ending, M/M, Sportacus why would you even attempt this, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, kitchen disaster, secret friends day 2.0
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-19
Updated: 2017-09-19
Packaged: 2018-12-31 17:06:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12137133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sportscandycollective/pseuds/Sportscandycollective
Summary: My secret friends day 2.0 gift for aleinnilatabae on Tumblr or Sequesters here on AO3! They just requested some fluff, so I rolled with it with some Sportarobbie fluff!Sportacus decides to surprise his boyfriend Robbie with a cake for his birthday, and it goes about as wrong as you'd imagine.Based on Prompt: https://otp-fanfic-ideas.tumblr.com/post/146754110343/imagine-your-otpNOTICE: PLEASE DO NOT REPOST MY WORK ONTO OTHER WEBSITES.





	Happy Birthday, I Made You a Mess

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Sequesters](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sequesters/gifts).



On paper, the plan seemed pretty solid and, dare he say it, kind of romantic.

The first step had gone smoothly: get Robbie out of his lair for a few hours. A coupon for an afternoon spa treatment had covered that step quite nicely, and for obvious reasons Robbie didn’t put up any sort of a fuss. Who would complain or argue about being randomly gifted an afternoon itinerary of an hour long hot stone massage, seaweed wrap, and sea salt scrub with facial?  
The second step had gone smoothly as well: get the lair decorated before Robbie got back. Simple. Within one hour, Sportacus had covered the whole main room with purple and blue streamers, balloons, and twinkle lights he’d bought from the hardware store. In Sportacus’s opinion, the room looked like it’d been lifted from one of those social media sites Pixel had shown him.

It was the third step that was giving Sportacus some problems.  
Granted, he didn’t know what he was thinking when he’d decided on Robbie’s big birthday surprise. As someone who can’t even stomach a single grain of sugar, what made him think he could successfully bake a cake that was edible and without burning down the entire bunker? Obviously at the time, Sportacus felt that his lack of baking knowledge wouldn’t be an issue. You could just make a cake with one of those instant mixes, right? Simple as that.  
Except, of course, for Sportacus caving to that gnawing thought that gifting Robbie a cake made from an instant mix was, for lack of a better word, pretty _lame_. As if he couldn’t go to the actual effort to make a real cake from scratch. The thought didn’t sit well with him. Robbie deserved to have something made from his own hard work and heart, not from some box of factory packaged dry ingredients that he just dumped water into and baked. Despite the daunting task, Sportacus had steeled himself with determination, and picked a beautiful, simple chocolate. It looked so pretty in the picture, and seemed fairly easy. Shouldn’t be a problem to bake, right?

Well, at the moment, present Sportacus wanted to kick past Sportacus for picking a recipe so ambitious.  
Getting the ingredients had been easy enough; he just followed the recipe. Problems came about with the preparation.  
The first mistake was just juvenile. He’d gotten ready to beat the eggs and accidentally forgot to check the speed on the mixer, which for whatever reason had been set to max speed. The rapid rotation of the whisk nearly sent the bowl flying out of the hero’s hands, and resulted in his uniform being splattered with egg yolk. Messy, but nothing he couldn’t ignore.  
The other mistake he made was much more of an issue. The recipe called for two cups of flour, two cups of salt, and one teaspoon of sugar. Easy enough, and Sportacus measured each of the dry ingredients and threw them into the bowl, mixing them with the wet ingredients. After the batter had been thoroughly mixed, he dipped a spoon into the mixture to get a whiff, looking for that sickeningly sweet smell that cakes always had. Instead, however, he was hit with the stinging scent of saltiness, one that made his mouth feel dry just from smelling it. He gave a confused look, flipping back through the recipe. He paused. The recipe called for _2 cups_ of sugar and _one teaspoon_ of salt.  
He smacked his forehead. How had he not caught that? He dumped out the over-salted batter and, after cleaning the bowls thoroughly, prepared to start all over again.  
Once he’d finally made another batch of batter (this time with the correct measurements), he carefully poured the mixture into a rounded baking pan that he’d already greased with some melted butter. As he did so, he made a note to himself to start looking for slightly healthier alternatives to his boyfriend’s usual baked goods. Just looking at the copious amounts of sugar and butter required for one cake was giving the hero a heart attack.  
He placed the cake tin in the oven before walking back towards the mixer, grabbing the ingredients he’d need for the icing because, hey, if he was going to the trouble to make a homemade cake, he’d might as well make the icing from scratch too. After all, making icing did seem a great deal easier than making the cake, given there’s only two steps. Should be a nice break.

Sportacus decided that, from now on, he would never underestimate the challenge of baking ever again, and he’d give extra props to Robbie and the kids for their confectionary creations.  
Because, of all things, it was when he got started with the icing that things really went wrong.  
He had been aware and cautious while pouring the ingredients into the mixer, and he’d made sure that the mixer was indeed set on a lower setting as he added the chocolate powder carefully, with small amounts at a time. He had been careful, but sometimes mistakes happened, and in his case his mistake was accidentally bumping the side of the mixer, setting the speed up to its highest power.  
Sportacus also vowed to never touch a mixer again in his life as icing splattered everywhere, exploding in a mixture of brown and white icing that left spots on the cabinets, counter, and Sportacus. He spat and sputtered, immediately wiping around his mouth to make sure none of the sugary icing slipped past his lips and into his mouth. The last thing he needed was a sugar meltdown, when no one was around to help him.  
By the time he’d finally turned off the mixer, the corner of the kitchen was an absolute disaster zone. All the hero could do was sigh, and grab a wet rag as he wiped away the spattered chocolate icing off the walls and surfaces.  
After he finished cleaning up the icing, neglecting to clean off the smudges of chocolate off his uniform because he knew it’d just smear, he successfully made another batch, this time keeping a very close eye on the speed switch. A few minutes later, he made what looked like acceptable, mostly creamy icing. Sportacus gave it a nod. It looked tasty. Too bad he’d never know if what he made was good.  
As he detached the mixer bowl, he sniffed the air, finally catching the sour smell in the air. He raised an eyebrow, his gaze turning towards the oven, which was currently seeping thin, black smoke into the air.  
“Oh -!” Sportacus cried, tossing the bowl back onto the counter and sprinting towards the oven. He threw open the door, coughing and sputtering as smoke poured out into his face. He fanned the smoke away, finally clearing it enough to catch a glimpse at his cake. His heart dropped; the cake was already scorched pitch black. It absolutely stumped him; hadn’t he put the cake in only a few minutes ago? How could it have burnt in that time? Was he just _that_ bad at baking?  
Sportacus’s face fell as he reached in, too distracted by the weight of his failure to remember the heat of the oven as his fingers grazed the sides of the metal tin. He yelped and jumped back, sucking on his slightly singed fingers, biting back a curse that welled in his throat. He grabbed the oven mitts on the counter top, sliding his hands into them before he reached into the oven once more, this time pulling out the burnt remnants of what barely passed as a “cake”.

For a moment, Sportacus wondered if it might be salvageable. Perhaps if he smeared enough icing on it?

…no, of course that wouldn’t work. One bite in and Robbie would be spitting the cake across the floor.

His ears drooped under his hat, and he felt himself grow sadder than he expected. So much for a nice surprise for his boyfriend. So much for him having a birthday cake.

Maybe he’d have enough time to run to the store instead. Get him one of those fun cakes that have fondant dinosaurs on top, and “Happy Birthday” written in loopy letter and sugary, red icing. He might find that fun –

“I’m home!”  
Sportacus froze, and spun around, his eyes freezing open and wide.  
He could hear Robbie cough and choke as the sounds of his shoes tapping against the metal iron filled the room.  
“What the heck’s going on in here? What’s with all the smoke?” asked Robbie, as he finally reached the floor. He stopped as soon as he finally saw the decorations and balloons that hung around the ceiling, and the nicely decorated table with flowers and his nice plates. The confused anger switched to surprise as he gazed around the room. He stepped slowly towards the kitchen, looking at his boyfriend with a shocked surprise.  
“Sportacus?”  
Sportacus, unwilling to let his disappointment show, forced a half-smile.  
“Hey Robbie.”  
Robbie gave a look to the burnt…thing in Sportacus’s hands.  
“Is that…?” Robbie said quietly, pointing at the cake.  
Sportacus’s eyes briefly darted to the cake before looking back at Robbie. He gave an awkward and nervous laugh.  
“It’s, um, supposed to be a cake. But I guess I had some problems.”  
“No kidding.” Robbie noted, as he crossed around the counter and got a better look at his boyfriend and the state of the kitchen. Smears of flour, icing, and batter mixed with egg yolks stained much of the surface area. The oven was still smoky. And as for his boyfriend…well, he looked like what a painting by Jackson Polluck would look like if he switched his paints for frosting and a canvas for a very beleaguered, frazzled elf.  
“You can’t even _eat_ cake. Why’d…?”  
Sportacus gave him a strained smile.  
“I thought I’d give it a try. I didn’t think it’d be so hard.” Sportacus confessed. His smile fell. “I was hoping to surprise you, but I guess it didn’t go as planned.”  
Robbie stopped right in front of him.  
“Sorry for messing up your kitchen.” Apologized Sportacus.

Robbie frowned, then, much to Sportacus’s surprise, he broke a piece of the cake off from the pan. He popped it in his mouth, his brow furrowing as he scrutinized its taste.  
“W-Why would you eat that? It’s burnt!” Sportacus said in shock.  
Robbie shrugged. “Well, because it’s actually not bad. It’s burnt, definitely, but it’d be pretty good otherwise.”  
Sportacus’s face lit up. “Really?”  
Robbie smiled. “I would never lie about cake, Sportacus. If I say it’s good, it’s good.”  
A genuine, relieved smile crossed Sportacus’s face. The goofy one, the one that let a canine slightly poke over a lip. The one that Robbie both hated and loved.  
“I…wow, I’m…well, that’s a miracle.” Sportacus said with a laugh.  
Robbie smirked, then wiped a blot of chocolate icing off the hero’s uniform. He sucked the icing off his finger as he said.  
“If you ever try again, maybe use my other oven. The one you used is finicky as all heck. I never use it for a reason.”  
Sportacus blushed out of embarrassment.  
“Oh, well that makes more sense. I wondered how the cake burned in ten minutes.”  
Robbie smiled, then gently cupped Sportacus’s cheek.  
“You think you’re gonna try and bake again?”  
Sportacus laughed, then shrugged.  
“I think I’ll leave the baking to you and the kids. When I do it, I’m just a mess.”  
Robbie smirked, then leaned in and kissed some icing off the hero’s nose.  
“Yes, but you’re _my_ mess.”

Sportacus blushed a brighter red, then said,  
“You know, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so affectionate before.”  
Robbie raised an eyebrow. “Wonder how that could happen? All that happened today was I got to have a whole day of just getting pampered and tended to, and I get to come home to my boyfriend covered in chocolate icing after attempting to make my favorite food, despite him having no experience with baking.” He smirked. “I think I’ve had a pretty great day, Sportadork. Are you really that surprised?”  
Sportacus smiled. “When you put it like that, I guess not.”  
Robbie pulled the hero into a hug, and kissed another splotch of chocolate off the hero’s cheek.  
“Happy birthday, Robbie.” Sportacus said, kissing Robbie’s cheek.  
“Thanks, Sportacus.” The villain responded, adding another kiss to Sportacus's nose.

**Author's Note:**

> @Sequesters: I hope you enjoyed this and you liked it! And hope it was fluffy enough for your tastes.
> 
> Thank you all for reading!


End file.
